We’ll go over exactly what it takes to ensure that your customers, whoever they may be, be they your spouse, your children, your staff, or your customers, are present during your conversations and why. If they’re not with you, you better pull a parachute and make something magical happen. We’re going to get into engagement learning. All right. So here we go, guys. This is where the rubber meets the road. There are three things that you need to do to make sure that your customers are happy. And remember, first I want to define what a customer is in our world. “Customers” is anyone that you’re talking to. You’re conveying information. And whether that may be your desire to have your kids take the garbage out or your desire to have a new customer come in, your desire to have the staff act differently, whatever it doesn’t matter, your customer is everyone. Now, I want you to get that your customer is everyone that you’re talking to. It could be your good friend, and you’re trying to set up a golf date. Guess what? There’s going to be conflict. Things that come up, your customers need to be on the same page as you. And how do we do that? How do we make sure that your customers are where they need to be so that we can effect change? And the information that you’re conveying is actually accepted.
All right. So I’m going to go into why it really was a massive turning point for me. And that is going to take a little bit of time. I’m going to tell you this little story, but it’s really worth it. So I remember I was in this course and one of the rules we had was that before you could even start the course, uh, one of the rules in the course was to be here now. And I remember thinking at the time that it was a little bit ridiculous because, of course, I’m here. I’ve already paid the money. I’ve shown up. I’m here. But you know what the really funny thing is, is that even though I was present mentally, I was able to check out whenever I wanted to check my phone, do some texting, whatever, and move away from here. And I find that people do that way more now than ever.
Everybody wants to check their cell phones. Everybody wants to look up some new information. I had this random thought. And in the later episode, we’re going to get into the dopamine response and how that’s affecting people and their attention span, and why it’s so crucial that you need to be on your game. But for right now, in this episode, we need to discuss how to get you in the room and make sure that your customer stays in the room with you. Because having that connection is absolutely fundamental in order for you to get your point across and to evoke the change that you’re looking for. So first things first: the very first thing you need to do is make sure that you are here. Now, you are listening and present at that moment. You aren’t running to 10 different other places in your mind thinking, ” I wonder what I’m going to eat for supper tonight.”
I gotta remember to stop at the store and get soy sauce, right? You’ll find, and I promise you, this happens to you because it happens to 99.9% of the population, that when you’re in a conversation with somebody, you’re doing 10 other things. You’re not really in that conversation. And I can promise you, when you go to a restaurant tonight or tomorrow, or this weekend, I want you to look around and see how many people are sitting across the table from someone they care about. And they have their own; I’ve been to restaurants where, when you look across the table, no one is talking; everyone is on their own phone table of four. Everybody’s sitting down on their phone. Oh my God. When you go to a restaurant, you should have a rule. That phone goes in the pocket or in the far corner on silent, on airplane mode, whatever you’re supposed to be present in that moment. And you will find that when you’re talking with someone, when their eyes start to drift, which is where the first thing is to make sure you’ve got constant eye contact. When their eyes start to drift, when they start to look away or at the lone star in the sky, you’ve lost them and they’re going to grab their phone. And now, holy macro, you know what? And, and I’m not saying it’s a hundred percent your fault. I’m saying you gotta be 100% aware of it because if you’re not present and they’re not present, what the heck is the point of the conversation at all? You might as well just go and move on to something completely different. So step one is to make sure you’re present, and make sure that step two is that you’re maintaining eye contact at all times.
Okay, So, step one is to make sure you are present. You’ve got to be present at that moment with people. Step two is to make sure you’re maintaining eye contact. Because when you’re present and you’re maintaining consistent eye contact, you will find it much easier to understand where that person is coming from. And if you need to make adjustments in your conversation or in your information in order to know, this sounds super simple, but you’ll be shocked at how many people don’t do it. And I don’t, I’ve been, I want to tell you one other story, and then we’re going to get to the third point, and then I’m going to let you go. I was in a meeting once with somebody who was selling me, uh, a product, and I was totally not interested. And I said, “You know what? I’m not interested. And she kept talking and talking, and I had work to do, and she kept talking.
So I started leaning back in my chair, and then I was glancing over at my computer, which was right there. And then finally, she was there for a long time, a long, long time. I turned over and I started answering some emails. She’s over here. And she kept talking. She did not care that I was not interested. Finally, I stopped. And I said, “Listen, I need to get to work.” Can you wrap this? And this is now years ago, but that’s the difference between somebody who’s engaged and observing what’s going on and somebody who’s in their own world and doesn’t care in order for you to make the change that you’re looking to make. Learning happens when you’re in contact with the customer. And finally, it goes back to our entire premise right now, which is taking your information and linking it to their interests.
So let’s say you’re talking to a brand new person. You go into their office, scan the room, see if they have any interests, and start your casual conversation. Maybe it’s about golf. Maybe it’s about tennis. Maybe it’s about horseback riding. Who knows, they might find an interest and then start to try to link your information to their interests. If you want them to stay engaged with you, you need to make sure you’re linking your information to their interests. We’ll get into values. We’ll get into the learning styles. We’ll get into hobbies and all those things but start with just our interests. Interests are easy. And then, this works wonders on one. On the one hand, I’ll show you how to do it in a group setting later, but for now, let’s just focus on connecting information to current interests. All right, everybody, go out and try this thing. Be present in the moment. Make sure you maintain eye contact and then start linking.
